"I don’t know what I want anymore. I’ve done everything right - worked hard, cared for others, kept things together. And now? I just feel … hollow. Like I’m watching my own life from the outside.”

I hear this every week. From women who are brilliant, loving, capable, who’ve poured themselves into work, family, friends for years. Until one day, they realize: “I don’t know who I am anymore.”

Shall I stay in this job that drains me? Try to save this relationship, or let it go? Shall I push for the change or just accept things as they are?

I’ve been there, too.

You scroll through job listings, try meditation apps, sign up for that course everyone’s talking about. You make a list of dreams, then question if any of them are even yours. You walk, you talk, you journal. You start gratitude journal. You cry.

Nothing feels right.

You start wondering: Why is this so hard? Why can’t I just figure it out?

But here’s what I want you to know: Nothing is wrong with you.

This isn’t failure. This is the moment before something new begins.

This is what happens when you’ve been strong for too long.

When life has demanded so much from you that you forgot how to listen to your own voice. To lose track of what you actually want. When the old version of you, that knew exactly what to do, has started to fade away… but the new one hasn’t spoken yet.

It can feel like you’re broken, like you’ve lost your way. But let me tell you something: It’s where change starts.

I’ve seen it happen.

Before a divorce.

After diagnosis.

When changing jobs.

When the kids leave home. During menopause. After a loss.

And I’ve lived it myself, many times.

It’s not a dead end. It’s a turning point.

So what do you do when you don’t know what you want?

You slow down. You listen in. You don’t rush to fix it.

Here are a few small ways to begin:

• Sit in silence. No music, no podcast. Just you.

• Take a walk without a goal. Let your thoughts wander.

• Write something, anything. No edits. Just see what shows up.

• Breathe deeply. Let your body remind you you’re still here.

• Talk to someone who listens without trying to fix it. A friend, a journal or ... me.

Ask yourself these few questions - don’t answer them, just let them be:

• What’s no longer true for me?

• What do I want to feel more of?

• What am I tired of pretending to be?

• When did I last feel truly alive?

You don’t need the answers right away. Just asking them can shift something.

If you’re reading this, maybe it’s time.

Time to stop pretending everything’s fine.

Time to admit that you’re allowed to want more or just need a change.

Time to stop chasing the version of yourself that no longer feels true.

Time to listen, really listen to your heart.

Because what you want might not arrive as a plan. It might come as a single sentence. A small yes that feels like home.

And when it comes, you’ll know. Because it will feel like you.

And if you feel a bit lost right now, you’re not alone.

If you’d like someone to talk to, just someone who’ll really listen, I’m here.

I won’t give you answers.

I can give you presence, deep listening and space to help you hear your own voice again.

Because what you want is already inside you. It’s just waiting for you to hear it.